It is hard work making a tiny human.
It’s so exhausting carrying around 30 extra pounds, suffering through heartburn and a wide assortment of aches and pains, getting up at all hours of the night to go tinkle, and do I really even have to mention the hormones?
Towards the end of pregnancy, it really takes an act of faith everyday to get up and keep moving– faith that pregnancy, despite how it feels, really won’t last forever…especially when your tiny person is 6 days past her due date!
But in the end, the result is always worth it.
Because miraculously, God uses fragile and broken people– mommies– to bring forth life.
This is Evelette Elise Morgan. And one month ago today, God used me to bring her to life.
On April 15, I woke up (after a full moon/ lunar eclipse) six days past my due date, and was devastated once again to find that I didn’t have a baby in the middle of the night…like everyone thought I would.
But soon after getting up and moving around, I had some ‘signs’ that pointed to imminent labor. Half in denial, I told my husband that we were finally having a baby. To which he responded, Are you sure?
I called the Dr.’s office and told them that I thought I was probably, more than likely, hopefully, fingers crossed, going into labor very soon. They told me to come on in.
We decided to drag our feet, since my mother-in-law had to come from out of town to keep the kids, and since I hadn’t actually felt any significant contractions…so we slowly gathered our things and loaded the car and showered.
I fixed my hair and put on make up, and two hours later, my lovely mil arrived. By that time I could tell, barely, that I was having contractions about every 8 or 9 minutes. SO EXCITING! But I still thought labor might be a day away.
But just in case I was in labor, I decided to ask my husband to detour at Sonic before going to the clinic…because once I got there they would tell me not to eat, and then I would be hungry all day. So instead, I ate a big hamburger and ff…hoping I wouldn’t regret it.
What’s the expression? Better to beg forgiveness than ask permission.
Sure enough, when I got there, 2 1/2 hours after I had spoken with the nurse on the phone and wielding a sonic cup, the nurse was not happy. Are you still contracting?? she asked. I told her yes, every 8 minutes. And she nervously had me sit and wait for the Dr to get back from lunch. Asking me a few times if I was okay…
Once called back, I was monitored and eventually checked by my Dr. who told me that I was 5-6 cm dilated! What? But I could hardly feel the contractions!
My Dr. sent me right over to the hospital to be checked in, again reassuring me that my plans for a natural birth would be respected, and telling me he would see me in a bit.
Once at the hospital, I was checked into my room and monitored for 20 minutes. While listening to the precious sound of my baby’s heartbeat, my nurse carefully read over my birth plan and discussed it with me. About the time that she finished, my mom and good friend/doula, Emily, showed up. Then we got going!
I began to feel contractions over the next couple hours, but they progressed very slowly and I very calmly breathed through each one. I know it’s strange, but I loved those early contractions when I began to feel pain. It was so exciting, and it was so manageable! It was the perfect labor that I had planned for! Emily and Brandon rubbed my palms through a few contractions, and then my nurse brought in a birthing ball (and the heavens opened).
The birth ball was my best friend during labor. I sat comfortably on that thing the whole time! My sweet husband sat behind me, and we comfortable began working together and figuring out the perfect counter-pressure. We did this for a while as the contractions slowly intensified.
I was so relaxed the whole time and so unafraid of the future. Emily and I had spoken before labor about not being fearful and just focusing on the present…and that is exactly what I did. Finally, things started to get intense and my nurse asked me if she could check my progress. I agreed, and found that I was 8-9 cm! Annnnd, begin transition!
After I got check, I stood up to move to the restroom and stood over the sink through a contraction or two. They were so intense that my husband HAD to continue counter-pressure for the pain not to kill me. (I also realized that I was involuntarily moaning through each contraction! ha.)
I swear he worked as hard as I did! And sweet Emily was there to relieve him when he needed a break. I ended up standing with my arms over my husband’s back, with Emily squeezing my hips when I finally gave in and announced that it was time to push.
This part was a little awkward. I ended up sitting in the bed, straight up. My nurse asked me if I wanted to lay back and I said no… but my Dr. being the hilarious man that he is, persuaded me once he got there that if I didn’t lay back a bit, I would end up sitting on the baby… and so I relented.
I never thought of myself as a screamer… but guess what? I am!
I screamed. I cried. I begged for mercy. At once point, I wailed pitifully, “This was a really bad idea”…which resulted in a collective “awwww…nooooo, honey” from my onlookers.
But after a lot of screaming and several unproductive pushes, my Dr. got eye level with me and lovingly said… Okay. Either we are going to sit here and scream, or we are going to push. But we are not going to do both.
And so I shut my mouth for a minute and pushed and… to everyone’s excitement, my water broke with the most epic, and dramatic gush… shooting– no lie– 10 feet across the room. Thankfully no one was standing there. I still think that was everyone’s favorite part. Other than the baby being born, of course.
45 minutes later, and with a lot more unashamed screaming, my little girl took her first breath. The Dr. put her on my chest and we just lay there staring at each other and falling in love. Everyone cried– because she was so beautiful, but also because they’re all so empathetic they were glad my pain was over!
It was the perfect birth–relatively painless until the end, and then shockingly painful. Really, no one could have prepared me for the ‘pushing’ pain. yikes. But it was an experience full of love, and peace, and support. My ‘birth team’ was amazing, and I felt so loved and cherished by all of them. My husband especially was my hero, and birth- was very much a romantic experience, with him being my knight in shining armor.
And my baby was perfect! She stopped crying every time I held her, and even when they took her to be weighed, she looked around as if searching for me. We had an instant bond.
This was the face she made when they took her to be weighed. Now she makes that face when she wants milk.
Holding Daddy’s hand…
My Dr. was my guardian that day and made sure that my labor was exactly how I wanted. By the end of my pregnancy and labor I felt like he was an old friend. I highly recommend him to anyone wanting a natural labor experience!
Evelette’s first month has been amazing. I have experienced no post pardum depression, no feelings of being an overwhelmed-mother-of-4. It has been a smoothe, wonderful transition. Every minute with her is worth all the pain. And being a newborn’s mommy makes me remember my other babies and stirs up such affection for them.
The Lord has blessed me beyond measure, and I cannot wait to tell Evelette of His goodness, as I have told the others.
May He work in me day by day, that I might lead her to Him.